Things That Make Your Sphincter Pucker

[Dee]

Doing the Love/Hate exercise, Mz Peggy and I were thinking about how much easier it is to think about things that annoy us, rather than what we hate. How maybe that could be a great writing prompt. Though Mz Peggy thought that perhaps we shouldn't be so negative, but hey. It could be very therapeutic! So there's nothing for it, here is our new writing prompt, dudes! Named after Mz Lash's hilarious thread in the Red Tent.

Your poem can be a kind of list poem pulling together a bouquet of annoyances, or you can just focus on one particular annoyance and let it rip.



Either way, the main point of this writing prompt is to have fun, Ladies.

[Dee]

Driving

the first red light is really no bother
the second still feels part of the course
but the third in a row is
getting a little annoying

the fourth raises an eyebrow
the fifth your blood pressure
the sixth the strong possibility that the
whole world is out to get you

but you brace yourself
and to gain the upper hand
you tell the world to
bring. it. on.

expect to get
a red light again
invite it even
will it to happen

and when it comes
you greet it with a smile
hello red light
fancy seeing you again old chum

it becomes a twisted
playground game
you can't catch me if
i don't run

and you drive on feeling smug
this is the way to deal with this world
trying to test you round every corner
nothing can phase you now

and then the next light is green
how.
bloody.
annoying.

[Dee]

And another that was actually a post in the original thread, but was already written as a kind of poem:

this morning

i've stepped into
a little ball of
mouse intestines

with
bare
foot

i love my cat
i love my cat
i love my cat

[Moonchime]

Love these little nuggets which are so deceptively simple.

The first one is so clever in the way in which it moves up the levels of annoyance - first of all you're ok with the red light, and then bit by bit you get more and more annoyed, which cleverly builds to a crescendo, until you decide you're going to play fate at its own game and welcome the whole annoying factor with calm and positivity.

A cunning plan indeed - your buttons aren't going to be pressed anymore - you're in control - until of course you're not. Great use of the full stop for emphasis and the red/orange font for anger. The arrangement of the 4 lines into verses helps order the experience and the single words pack a punch at the end. The circle of annoyance is complete. Brilliant and witty. Really enjoyed the trip.

As for second one - it succeeded in turning my stomach - but the brevity is perfect for impact with those last few lines driving home how you feel about it. Bare feet as well - yuk!!!
Thank you Mz Dee for making me smile (and grimace too).

[Lori]

These are great. Don't we say you can't claim it until you name it? As in understand it and put it to bed. I suppose intestines are better than live snakes which is what I heard recently a little cat was doing. We love cats? Yes?

Spoiler:

[Iris]

Ha ha! Love the humour which we often see in your poetry, Mz Dee!
I'm not sure I've ever seen you even in the slightest bit annoyed so it was interesting that even the pain described made me giggle in the way you wrote. I appreciate the mindfulness approach to it; noticing one's thoughts and feelings and letting them float by. But then the hilarious twist at the end when the lights seem to know your game.
Brilliant!

The second poem was so impactful by its punchiness. No messing about . . . I feel your disgust but then the trauma of trying to tell yourself that you really do love your little furry friend despite her actions.


Funny that we have both written about driving in terms of what has vexed us.

Save Our Planet!

Go green they say
Buy electric they say
Ditch evil fuels they say

And so commences
The conservationists' journey
Gloatingly. Smugly.

Petrol crisis?
Oh, sorry to hear
You can’t get out

Smirking, we
Cleanly zoom by
Snakes of gas-guzzlers

Glee soon sprints off
Into minimised
Carbon-footprint

As we frenetically
Hunt for functioning
Food for our eco warrior

Four.
Damned.
Hours.

[Iris]

These are great. Don't we say you can't claim it until you name it? As in understand it and put it to bed. I suppose intestines are better than live snakes which is what I heard recently a little cat was doing. We love cats? Yes?

Spoiler:

Feeling rather relieved to be feline-free!

[Dee]

These are great. Don't we say you can't claim it until you name it? As in understand it and put it to bed. I suppose intestines are better than live snakes which is what I heard recently a little cat was doing. We love cats? Yes?

Spoiler:

That’s such a perfect caption! They’re indeed born Royalties.

But they’re also born Life Artists. So I take the odd moments annoyance as a fair price to pay for the pleasure of watching this fabulous Life Artistry in action!

[Dee]

Thank you, my dear friends, for having a little romp with a couple of my little annoyances and reflecting so lovingly. It’s always so heartwarming to read a review, isn’t it? And I’m glad to know I made you chuckle - and sorry about the intestines.

(Cat says she’s not sorry.)

I really enjoy writing lighthearted poems - it’s such a different experience from the ones that are born from pain.

Mz Iris, your poem of annoyance has come from a lot worse incident than a silly chain of red lights! Four hours of looking for a functioning charging station with a long journey ahead in the dark and a grumpy teenager in the back, could probably qualify to be filed under pain v mere annoyance.

But you’ve managed to make it light and funny - whilst the poem also manages to highlight the very real issue of the country’s frustrating unpreparedness to support green initiatives.

Still my favourite part of the poem was this:

Petrol crisis?
Oh, sorry to hear
You can’t get out

Smirking, we
Cleanly zoom by
Snakes of gas-guzzlers

Love the perfectly pictured attitude here. Especially knowing how it’s all going to be turned around in the end!

Gotta love the power of poetry - turning such an unpleasant experience into a piece of fun writing.

Looking forward to the next offering in this thread, Ladies!

[Moonchime]

Ms Iris you have turned a quick and able hand to this task - no trouble - I'm still thinking about the Sea and love and hate!!!

I very much enjoyed this little offering which as Agi said has come from a journey from hell -it's no wonder you found the words flowed readily - or at least it feels as if they did.
I like the way you start with the preachy things that we are told to do repeating "they say" at the end of each line.
That's rapidly followed by the verses showing the view of those who have gone greener and had the joy of watching others struggle at the petrol pumps. Tight, neat verses of smug delight which suddenly turn as the problems switch around and you are left searching for "food" for your wonderfully named "eco-warrior." A bitter pill, the horror of which is brought home by the wonderfully terse last verse. It's punchy, direct, and gets straight to the heart of it with just three words - all the more powerful because they are just that - three words which hold in them the struggle, the angst and the frustration.
Great little poem Iris.

[Lori]

Can I please echo what Mz. K said above regarding the rather funny but frustrating dilemma with petrol and the not-quite-ready-for-primetime issues with the alternatives? Wonderfully stated in this Uber enjoyable read. (Do you all have Uber there? If so, perhaps the writer has this alternative?)

[Iris]

Ms Iris you have turned a quick and able hand to this task - no trouble - I'm still thinking about the Sea and love and hate!!!

I very much enjoyed this little offering which as Agi said has come from a journey from hell -it's no wonder you found the words flowed readily - or at least it feels as if they did.
I like the way you start with the preachy things that we are told to do repeating "they say" at the end of each line.
That's rapidly followed by the verses showing the view of those who have gone greener and had the joy of watching others struggle at the petrol pumps. Tight, neat verses of smug delight which suddenly turn as the problems switch around and you are left searching for "food" for your wonderfully named "eco-warrior." A bitter pill, the horror of which is brought home by the wonderfully terse last verse. It's punchy, direct, and gets straight to the heart of it with just three words - all the more powerful because they are just that - three words which hold in them the struggle, the angst and the frustration.
Great little poem Iris.

How has more than a month passed since you wrote this kind review, Mz Moonchime? You have captured the sense of it perfectly and how the emotions changed from smugness to despair. Thank you very much for taking the time to feed back.